Jason Todd/RedHood rumble in Gotham

I was having a nice time... Rubbing my girlfriend's smooth legs while convincing her to get nude... Vel got her stop off when freaking Damian comes in, breaking the window.

“Kid what are you doing at the Bat's safe hose."



The kid gives me a snotty look. “I’m telling father you're cavorting with a gutter skank in his house you zombie!"

Cavorting? The brat's been around Alfred too long. “Hey!" Vella protests. “I’m a princess! I'm not some ho he picked up... I actually pursued him... and what are you staring at?"


I slap my forehead "Vella put on your shirt. You've probably jump started the Son of Satan's puberty."


She uses her ring to recreate her costume." Um Why are you still staring at me... hey Jason I'll se you later he's really creeping me out. Bye!" She flies in out the window... While I'm feeling... blue if you get my drift.

“What do you want you little C-blocker?" I growl.

“What’s a C-blocker?"

" Never mind, Bruce is probably going to kick my ass for you seeing Vella's melons I don't wanna get in more trouble so again why are you here?

Tim was chasing me around with a butterfly net... I came here until father returns I didn't know my zombie older brother and his freak girlfriend where here."

“Yeah you thought she was a freak when you were drooling over her half naked body weren't you? And I'm not a zombie!"

“You were dead and buried weren't you?" He grins “if you're not a zombie then what are you?"



" Well you see Superboy Prime hit a wall somewhere..."

I just realized how stupid that sounds... "It was magic okay."

We glare at each other. “Well since I'm not getting laid tonight I might as well get into a fight. SHIELD is after me wanna help me warn 'em off?"

“What’s getting laid?" he questions.

"Gah! Go on the internet or ask your friends or something."

Anyway a little later Red X is on the prowl.

And as predicted he's jumped by the Black Widow. She fights him pretty well but I think she notices the difference in his fighting style.

I laugh from the opposite roof “you got suckered! That’s my little brother is wearing lifts... I'm right here! You could beat one of us Natasha... but both of us I don't think so. You don't have to do this I registered so I'm not outside the law."

“Your little gang war was outside the law Nick wants me to bring you in!"

“Uh huh that’s not going to happen. So you can leave or I'll send your head to Fury in a duffel bag. "

She shoots one of these Widow's bite things. My body armor protects me and Damian jumps her from behind I told her she couldn't beat us both She tosses off the brat and I throw a punch at her jaw. She rolls with this but the glancing blow does still makes her see stars.

While she's trying to get her bearings Damian shoulder blocks her under the knee. She pulls a gun I shoot it out of her hand with mine. “Nice try Comarade." I put my gun to her head. “Any last words not in Russian?"


“Nick would never let you live after this."

“He should have thought of that before sending you after me ... he could have just left well enough alone but noooo."

Before I pull the trigger a disk with a bird on it knocks the gun out of my hand. Wonderful; "Red Robin" again.

Man Vella was right that costume is ugly. “So are you some alternate Earth me? Or just some douche who found my old costume in a dumpster, and decided to be a thrift store superhero?"

He doesn't talk but I can smell the dumpster on the costume man really wash the thing. “Red X This one is mine!" I order not that it matters... he was staring at Black Widow's chest. Sigh Batman is gonna kill me.

I take out the only good thing that Tim Drake gave me... the unbreakable crowbar.


Red Robin blocks the hit swing I hear a crack when it hits his wrist. “Surprised this thing can break the body armor huh?" Well here get more surprised." I slam
It into his ribs he falls gasping for breathe.

“I pick up my gun “Alright let's finish this."

“Do we have to kill this one?" Damian asks staring at Natasha.

“Yes, she betrays everyone her own country every guy she's been with Fury will thank me for this."

Next a Batarang knocks the gun out of my hand “Oh come on! Okay Tim you wanna fight... Oh Shit!"




Batman I'm too shocked to put up a fight before Batman throws a hard punch in my jaw. “I told you no killing, Red Hood."

“Are we in trouble father?" Damien asks.

“Yes you are. Widow! You tell Fury I'll take care of Red Hood, and to keep his spies out of my city."

Bruce chews me out after I wake up back at the cave. “It’s obvious you've been looking for attention since you left SHIELD, maybe even before. Fine you have my attention, Now you pay attention to me killing solves nothing Nightwing tried to kill the Joker, yet he's back out there causing chaos.

“Nightwing ... avenged me? And the Joker came back?"

I should have known Richard was cool with me as Robin.

But if the Joker can come back... then what I'm doing is as useless as Batman.

Batman growls, “if you want back in you have to stop killing."

“I’ll think about it." I snort. Yeah the problem is I really will have to think about it.